Shizulocks and the three vegetables
by CrackonKappacumbers
Summary: a Shizuo and the potatoe au story, CRACK fic c: Shizuo was a man with a blue and white dress of fluffyness on his merry way to kill Izaya, the big bad man of evil wolves, with his glasses potatoe friend Shinra, but on his way they find a house and went on an adventure inside, little does Shizulocks knows that three vegetables live in that house with a magical jean-the kappalord c:


**I is hungry**

**So I says this.**

Once upon a Marco-polo three vegetables live in a house. of notebooks.

There they lived was a family of three, the all-mighty carrot-dad, mama tomato and the kawaii baby potatoe.

"My berry is too round, like a tomato" said the handsome carrot poking at his berry of blue lunch with his fork.

"So you think I'm round" tomato raised his eyebrow.

"yeah, round is good, round is great, round is... foxy." carrot thought of a smart come back.

"ily too bby. But my berry too eggy filled with froggie eggs" he frowns

"I DUN LIKE BERRY can we have a human?" c: the little kawaii potatoe asked.

"NO, we gonna walk cause I say so. Now come" the orange of carrots commands with a 'haha no" face walking out the door with tomatoe by his side wear a fluffy hat, potatoe was sad, but he follow them anyways.

The kawaii potatoe never did like his dad. carrots were potatoes worst friend because they were too handsome than kawaii.

While the three of the vegetables went to go walking and fishing for onions.

A blob of long golden lock of hair of a hairy Shizou in a beautiful dress of blue and white came close to the house of veggies and one fruit.

Who came from nowhere.

His name was Shizulocks because of his soft and bouncy hair of locks like prince charming of the evils. And he was looking for the man that ruins everything in his and his friend, Shinra the potatoe with glasses lives.

Trying to feed him to kappas and their cucumbers of wisdom. But then he saw this house, this house of notebooks and fish.

"OOOO I like houses and jeans with wings, c'mon Shinra let's adventure!" Shizuo said with gee to his potatoe friend in his hair.

"okies c:" Shinra adjusts his glasses and jumps at the doorknob and hits the lock off "hyah ya!"

They went in the door to have Shizou finding some berry on bowl pow of the table of largeness in the room of in front of the master of doors. SHizou was a hungry little locks and he wished for something to eat with glory. He found the three bowls with berries of flavors in them and tried some of the berry in the big bowl pow.

"Paw this berry too round like izaya tomato" Shizou didn't like that taste.

the evil man came from no where and took the berry of tomato roundness.

"wat."

Shizou tried the next bowl that was beside the round bowl of berries. With egg shaped berries.

LAWWWP this berry too eggy taste for me!" Shizou barfed out the rainbows of berries. He didn't like that one either :c

Lastly he turned to the bowl of tinyness and flipped his bouncy hair to the side with a big blue bow to keep his hair in place while eating someone else's food. He took a bite.

"OOOOOO THIS BERRY TASTE JUST LIKE POTATOES" Shizou did love his potatoes. So he ate the whole blob in two bites. Shinra was afraid of Shizou for a while.

All full, Shizou was not hungry of the anymore and then sat on a floor in the living room of warmup suits.

"ahhh floor nieey hehhehea" Shizou liked floors it kept him from floating away from the ground. He started to make floor angels on the ground with Shinra beside him doing the same with his little stick limbs.

Then shizou went to a room with Shinra hopping behind him. A room filled with weird objects of smiles because he was done his floor angeling.

He saw a big fat..

chair sushi roll designed with a zerba tail on it's bottom. He went to sit on it with a jump.

"OAW this chair so bad and zebra" He landed straight on his bottom and hurt his soft cheeks.

Instead of the hard chair that he didn't like he found a toilett to sit on.

"OOOO toilet nice and shiny c:" Shizou adored his new family toilet-chan. But then he found something even better than a shiny toilet.

"AH I LOVE POTATO FARMS" He le gasped with a fangirl's squeal.

Shinra the potato came out of shizous hair and bounced into the farm too.

"YAY I LIKE" Shinra found little friends of his own now. But they all ran away from him because they didn't know of his glasses desu.

"O noe come back friends" Shinra was sad for this, running after the no glasses potatoes. Shizou laughed at him. Shinra cries out french fries, Shizou stopped laughing and put him back in his hair so Shinra could sleep as SHizuo sang a lullably.

Coming to another door in this house he came upon a beddy room full of pillows and unicorns plushes. Shizou turned out to be really sleepy after eating and playing with potatoes. He went to the bed that looked bumpy with green sticks of cucumbers sticking out of it. And landed in it with a hard thup!

"OFOOOFFF, owwwie this bed too much cucumbers inside." Shizou was disapointed.

Just then the kappa lord came out of the window of the room and touched Shizou with his hair, and ate the bed of cucumbers that now turned into kappacumbers due the power of the kappalord's stealings.

Shizou was not amused he got touched.

And so the kappa went hm hm hm and disappeared on his magical jean horse through the window and off to the skies with the monkey king and his friends the nemo flying fish of fury.

"o why I get touched" Shizou sighs as of tired that he is all he wants is to go to bed and sleep with potatoe Shinra beside him. He went to the fluffy bed of red bed sheets and flopped in it. And sniffed it, it did no smell good to Shizou.

"AWWM this bed smell like tomato SNIIIFFFFFF AHHH I DO NOT LIKE" Shizou frown with yuckness of thinking of that evil and crazy man of Izaya Orihara-yato and his kink for tomatoes. Shizou thought of him. damn.

Shizou than saw this baby like kawaii bed with rainbows over it's backboard. He jumped in it, thinking that it should be the one he would love the best.

"OO yus this bed smell just like potatoes. c:" Shizou was happy about this and sniffed the bed of it's comforting smell of potatoes. He soon fell into DEEP sleep for the day of today. Sadly for Shinra, he got out of Shizou's hair to go to the little potatoe's room, but as he reached for the toilet, Shinra fell in the water of toilet and got stuck there. Poor Shinra potatoe, he was not amused at this.

Just then the three vegtable went to go back to house from their walk and fishing for onions of happiness. Papa carrot noticed the lock was broken and checked the kitchen room of the room Shizuo was in eating.

"SOMEBODY STOLE MY BERRY i liked that berry too.." Carrot was sad at this.

"SOMEBODY BARF ON MY EGGS" Mama tomatoe was not amused to see that her precious eggs that were berries were barffed on with hints of milk and pudding in the blue globs.

"SOMEBODY ATE ALL MY POTATOE BERRY YAY" But kawaii baby potatoe was happy that his berry was gone.

The vegetables went into the room of floors and objets of smiles.

"LA GASP. SOMEBODY TOUCHED MY CHAIR THAT WAS PERFECT :C" Papa's chair was jumped on with the force of strong human.

"SOMEBODY THREW SOMETHING IN MY TOILET :C" Tomatoe found a sad little wet, sleeping potatoe with glasses in her prized toilet of cleaness.

"SOMETHING POTATOEY ROLLED ON MY FARM FINALLY C:" Again little potatoe of kawaiiness was happy for this to happen to his parents and things.

The parents of potatoe was NOT happy though. They ran with they stick leggys up to the bedd-bye room of goodness sleep to find,

"SOMETHING ATE MY BED, MY SECRET PLACE OF KAPPACUMBERS" Carrot has no more bed.

"SOMETHING sniffed my beddy-by AND ALL IT'S IZAYA PURFUME SMELL, I so lUcKy3" ;* Tomatoe was amazed at this and fangirled over the bed smell but at the same time wondering how a thing of human? could get this much smell of Izaya Orihara the great man of drawn pant and evilness.

Little potatoe went up to his bed to find a baby blue dress with white and a mop of blondelocks in his beddy-bye rainbow bed.

"SOMEBODY IN MY BED and IT'S A HUMAN! can I EAT THE HUMAN." asked potatoe with sparkles in his eyes.

They all touched shizous hair and they became veggie zombies, that was not expected.

Shizou woke up and screamed at the vegetable zombies in his way, it must be from the power of the kappa.

The zombies were no longer interested in Shizou now so they all went into Ikebukuro and touched their hairs to turn them into hairy hairs of locks.

Except for Simon because he had no hair.

Shizou followed for the fun of it while trying to find his friend, potatoe Shinra and killing Izaya if he could only smell him in the air in Ikebukuro, he had a balloon streetsign ready for him.

Simon tried to make Shizou into a yellow puppet dad but Shizou licked his hat to stop him.

"No my hattie, now I got nothing." Simon was sad of that.

But instead the potatoe turned into the dad and looked at the vegetables awkwardly with his nose

the vegetables were now kappa rolls and then started eating all of Simons kappacumbers

"no mine."

Once again Simon made all those rolls for sale.

the evil man bought the tomato one and then ate it.

Now he is one with his kink and went to find SHizou for some xxx of beer and sweeties.

Then Shizou ate one of the kappas hair and got cleansed, the other vegetables then got eaten.

Simon said "Sushi good, it cheap, eat the sushi."

BUT WAIT, THE POTATO GOT MUTATED AND TURNED INTO A GIANT POTATO :O

"Oh my god-IS THAT A TITAN" said a man of the lands of the neverending story lands of the seas and the rain.

Just then, everyone began to sing the attack on titan opening

"TITANS ARE MY TRIGGER." said Eren killing a titan of cucumbers that came out of the nowhere from the portal of AOT world of cucumbers and kappas.

Izaya decided to join the military police like the jean, he could find Shizou later, with a whip too.

Then the potato started making potatoes from the farm and made more titan potatoes.

"Nu potatoe"

Everyone got maneuver gear and started killing the potatoes, kawaii potatoe was their leader.

then all the potatoes ate them, with the remaining of eren's arm of deadness.

Now the kappa lord can't help them. If they are in tummies of potatoes and soup.

Expect for that hat person named Simon, and so the kappa lord gave him powers to defend the potatoes.

"I CAN MAKE ALL YOU INTO THE POTATOE SUSHI"

Simon did a titan cry and then turned into an Armstrong titan, by biting on his thumb of goodluck and breathe fire.

The potatoe said "Nooo THE ARMSTRONG TITAN TOO STRONG"

Simon flashed his hat around and all the potato titans fainted in his majestic hat.

Then the normal potatoe turn normal, the orignal potatoe that SHizou once lost and cheated on him with Shinra the potatoe.

"Dun do dat no more" said Shizou as his catches potatoe in his arms and hugs his tightly, looking at him with sparkles eyes like a prince in a shojou manga and potatoe was the princess.

"Okay." the orignal potatoe blushed in the arms of Shizulocks Heiwajima.

"Why." Izaya waddled out of a window on the ground.

Only Izaya was turned into Winnie the pooh and killed bees like berry.

Shizou started jumping up and did the yellow puppet dance, then the kappa appeared again and they all started doing the yellow puppet dance. why is that? Because they're all being too creative for the human good D:

This has got to have a have a stop to this madness that is creativeness with time. Izaya-man to the recuse with a secret sidekick at his side.

So she came again to disturb the peace and happiest. To "help" with zombie love to stop the dancing.

She started throwing knifes at the dancing puppets and people started becoming grass.

Simon was also grass now.

Shizou jumped and then kicked Anri's boobs. And then they exploded. Again.

Shizou laughed at that. Izaya snapped a photo of Shizou's panties, just before Shizuo could land a venting machine on top of him.

The kappasword of Yoshihiko the hero of the destiny of mario and link started sneezing kappa hairs again, and cleansed people from being such blades of grasses.

They ate jean with kappacumbers that they stole from carrot's bed.

Shizou met this guy and said

"Go away.. fat man." because he wanted to sniff Shizou's hair and his hair with only for potatoe. and maybe Izaya if he comes by with his whip cream of glory justice.

/Shizuo street signs the kappa lord for saying such personal things about the Shizulocks' life at night./

Horse man lady came from nowhere and then did bad things.

she made shizulocks into a fluffy. She was amused by this.

Shizu was ok tho cause it made him feel bouncy and free like the happy onion.

The potatoe felt very good because it was so bouncy and fluffy.

Mostly everyone was happy cause they got to eat a jean.

Jean was not happy tho.

A plane that had a water bottle inside was eating cookies and smiled.

Izaya use his super jump powers and then went on the plane.

He made him press "da pera sa swa" switch.

The water bottle was not happy. and jumped off the plane.

It turned into a marco-jean and started giving birth to kappa rolls from above.

Simon collected them and started selling them again.

Yoshihiko ate noodles from this person who was apparently fat and made from hats.

And so the three veggie who lived in the house of notebooks were now singing in people's bellies, in their hot tubs of acid human tummies.

Shinra jumped out of the toilet from a long time ago and sneezed on Izaya again because he was cold from being in a toilet.

Izaya then didn't like the fact he always gets sneezed on.

Shizou because he is now a fluffy, everyone else was happy that the sushi rain rolls tasted like happiness.

For Simon was a Armstrong titan after all, In fact, we know that he was the titan that made titans and that why they feed on humans.

Because Simon makes human meat of his sushi of titans making titans out of titans c: Yes.

Izaya was least happy because they were eating his humans. He really didn't like to share.

He was still Winnie because he can. and he was sexy. Shizou only wanted to dance with only a shirt on. only A shirt.

Celty the horse man lady then poured beer into Shizou in his little dress of fluffyness and he had become a piglet, because he had to became a piglet to be with Izaya to kill him and hold him by crashing his neck, yes and also,

cause pink is manly.

So Winnie the Izaya and little Piglet Shizuo lived happily ever after forever and ever together with the hate for each other, doomed to be with each other. with potatoe and tomatoe too.

THE END C:


End file.
